Thursday, March 13, 2008

Client 9

In Islamic teachings we're advised to always trust in God and never get conceited about our merits (or what we perceive as such). Sometimes the switch from virtuous to wicked is shorter than what we might imagine. Hafez (my favorite poet and fellow-citizen) has put it so well in one of his famous poems. A rough translation reads:

Relying on piety and lore in the path (of God) is heresy
The rover, even if possessing 100 virtues, should trust (in God)

It always boggles my mind when I hear of people who go into great length to make themselves a fame and then turn it into infamy in the stupidest way. And now, Eliot Spitzer has followed suit.

Not long ago, he had made himself a reputation as the Sheriff of Wall Street for his all-out war on corruption as a district attorney and later on as the New York State Attorney General. He won New York State gubernatorial election in 2006 in a landslide with a promise of ethical government and economy. There were even speculations that he might run for President some day. Now, Mr. Clean has found a new nickname: Client 9.

Whenever things like this occur, media close in like happy vultures, talk show hosts acquire a repository of jokes for several nights and people who make money out of anything find a new source of profit. Just after the news broke out, Client 9 T-shirts were available in various designs for amazing prices. Have a look here and here. Cyberculture didn't lag behind. All catchy domains like client9.com or client-9.com were immediately registered and now could be bought by interested buyers for a good fee. Read more here.

And of course, psychologists and analysts have a good thought fodder to chew on for a while. They come up with all sorts of theories (proven and unproven) to explain why high-profile politicians (who know they are under scrutiny by their political enemies) commit such stupid blunders.

As a conservative Muslim, my analysis is not so complicated: when you promote sinful behavior, the Devil will kindly appreciate your service by giving you the the opportunity to practice sin (one way or another). In his 2006 election campaign, Mr. Clean promised to legalize gay marriage. He was true to his word and proposed a bill for that matter after he was elected (the bill cleared the State Assembly but died in the State Senate). If the f***ing steamroller (as he once referred to himself) had not ruined his chance to run for Presidency, these stuff would had made great campaign items. Especially, the bib and the dog T-shirt are very impressive.

But seriously, what makes bright people (at least when it comes to intellectual assets) make mistakes that even a person with a medium IQ wouldn't do? Even if they don't care about God's surveillance, aren't they concerned that people might be on the watch? So many years after Monica-gate, I still wonder why an intelligent lawyer should do such a stupid thing while he was already under fire by Ken Starr for the Whitewater investigation (among others). He must have known that his political enemies would use anything to make their case. Yet he did what he shouldn't had done (and even worse, he left behind some incriminating evidence for his hunters). And his explanation years later in his autobiography makes even less sense.

And now another smart lawyer uses telephone (remember, we're living in post-911 era and Dubya's War of Terror) to procure himself this kind of professional service. And although he didn't deposit money directly to pay for the Imperial job, transferring large sums of money to a questionable third-party company (that handled the financial matters for the prostitution ring) would raise red flags to federal investigators in places like New York, where money-laundering is a common problem. Read more here.

What I hate the most about these scandals, is the public announcement and apology by the culprit, with the poor wife standing on the side. She has already suffered from the infidelity. Why should she undergo the extra humiliation in public with all eyes on her while the announcement is being made?

All political and psychological analyses aside, I wonder how did he manage to escape his security detail around 9 pm while on an official trip in a place like Washington DC. To me, this is the interesting part of the whole story.

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